Beth High
High Road Consulting
Abraham Lincoln—now that was a man who really knew how to be serious. Take a look at the penny for goodness sakes. That’s serious in every sense.
Our sixteenth President also had a lighter side. A renowned storyteller, Lincoln knew just how to engage and entertain his audience using his trademark slow-and-easy delivery style. He also was able to use his impressive stature and carriage to command attention and respect. Lincoln, like no other leader, had what it takes: a compelling combination of loftiness and levity.
On the levity side, Lincoln was known to regale his listeners with the 19th century equivalent of knock-knock jokes one of which went: "How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it a leg.” You can bet that got some tongues wagging North to South. You can also bet that Lincoln’s whimsical wit went a long way toward cutting the tension during those battle-brittle Civil War years.
A certain amount of another kind of tension is apparent in the presence of anyone who has power and authority. It’s in the air, all around them. You feel it. Then, all of a sudden, they crack a joke. Abracadabra! You smile, you laugh, you relax, and somehow you feel a little closer to them, any of them, all of them who come from Mt. Olympus offering up a joke. Humor does that. It makes us feel connected.
It's been that way for a long time. Consider how we connect with our babies. We make them laugh with our ridiculous noises. Consider our childhood friendships, all solidified by shared giggles in school or after lights out. Laughter is the glue, bringing us closer together by tapping into our shared humanity.
As leaders we need to cultivate that connection between ourselves and our followers. We want them to see the humanity in situations. Even more important, we want them to see the very real and very human side of us and the wonderfully warty human side of each other. What better way to show this than by lightening up and sharing a good laugh—there’s no such thing as a bad one.
As a leader, if you can make people laugh, you will connect with them. So keep those jokes and stories at the ready, keep the laughs coming.
Gulp… anyone starting to feel nervous? Palms sweaty? Throat dry? The question that’s stuck there is: As leaders, are we really expected to be entertainers? After all, we don't expect our entertainers to be leaders. Or do we? Ronald Reagan and Arnold Schwarzenegger notwithstanding, humor is an art form and just like art, no two people produce it the same way. Think of the comedians like Robin Williams, Bill Cosby, and Ellen DeGeneres. They’re all a riot and they each prompt that riot in different ways. Each has a style unique to them, making it authentic and genuine.
So get your own brand of humor that you can fold into your leadership style. How do you do this? Think back to the times you've made someone laugh. Think about what you said or did to bring that grin to an employee’s face. Remember the time you made that grisly meeting better by giving the group a chance to let off some steam and crack up. Let such moments be your guide.
Such a review of past performance will undoubtedly yield many moments of mirth that you’ve probably overlooked or forgotten. Maybe it was a self-deprecating remark that you made that turned down the amps in the room. Or perhaps you were able to point out some endearing human foible we all share yet rarely acknowledge. Or maybe you just shared a story that made you laugh 'til you cried. Whatever worked, worked because it came from the heart of the funny bone—the one we all share. Honor it, be genuine, and use it.
There is one exception: mean jokes. Making fun at someone else's expense doesn't create connection, it creates disturbance and distance. So, are blonde jokes out of the question? Look at your audience. If there are any light heads bobbing, you better head your humor elsewhere. No joke.
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